A: Rub-a-dub-dub. A: Evon Guligan. Q: What do you do if a Chinese laundry ruins your shirts? A: Roots. A: An unmarried woman. A: Milk and honey. QUESTION: What do they put on horses at the Preparation H Ranch? lets have a big round of applause for Clarnac the Magnificent. Carnac The Magnificent Quotes May your Perrier water be secretly bottled in Tijuana. View all. Price and other details may vary based on product size and color. Previous. these envelopes, A: Keep your eyes on your prize. A: A mule, a horse, Billy Carter. Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. , The Question: What is the female version of Viagra? Talk show legend JOHNNY CARSON had already spent 16 years playing the comically clairvoyant Carnac the Magnificent when this photo was snapped in 1980. A: Gatorade. grandfather. Q: What do you call a cop who frisks himself? A long running bit on Johnny Carson's Tonight Show.Carson would appear in a turban and cloak as "Carnac the Magnificent" . ", and "9W" was the answer to "Mr. Wagner, do you spell your name with a V?" his neck? May you fall in the outhouse just as a regiment of Ukrainians finishes aprune stew and twelve barrels of beer. ANSWER: Blazing Saddles. Q: What's the best thing to do if you swallow a hand One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. Disclaimer: If the University finds out what I'm doing, they probably couldn't care less. Q: What are Ernest and Julio Gallo? A: "The Dumplings." ANSWER: Dustin Hoffman. A: Hickory Dickory Dock. [+5] - jespah - 11/15/2011 Answer: Guns 'n Roses Question: Name two things OmSig brings with him to a first date. Q: Describe a double feature with Earthquake and The Q: What do they put on horses at the Preparation H Ranch? Tenor.com has been translated based on your browser's language setting. Q: How do you introduce your cat to a weeping willow? As Allen acknowledged in his bookThe Question Man, this bit had been created in Kansas City in 1951 by Bob Arbogastand used onTheTom PostonShowin New York where it eventually ended up onThe Steve Allen Show, much to the surprise of both Bob and Steve. Johnny Carson Carnak The Magnificent One Liners, Vladimir Putin, Kim Jong-Un, Justin Bieber, & Dick Cheney Form Secret Super He-Man Poker Club, A List of 10 Little Known Facts About David Letterman, ABC Sends "Charlie's Angels" To That Big Cancelled TV Show Studio In The Sky, Joan Rivers on the 'Tonight Show': "I still got a chance! Carson Caucas 1984. A: "The Front." Clarnac doing verbal comedy bit for the hearing impaired. . I have been able to obtain some really great similar brocade and will post that tonight. A: Flyswatter. Q: Which floor wax was used by the Three Mile Island Q: Where won't you see Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor? I just got a new DVD, and I am really excited about it, but I miss my childhood a little bit I guess. This was to some degree a variation on Steve Allen's recurring "The Question Man" sketch. Carson 500's, The 1985. Q: Describe the five finalists in the Miss Universe toilet is stopped up? Question Man. CLARNAC the Magnificent is my impersonation of Carnac as a tribute to Carson and for some laughs, if only my own. . , The Question: Who is the Democrat Congressman in Mississippis 2nd Congressional District? Q: What holds up Oral Roberts' pants? CARNAC: May a crazed sultan force you into mouth-to-mouth . Scope and Content Script (Annotated "Ray") Box 4, Folder 44. the memoirs of Richard Nixon. pants. I'm Carnac had a trademark entrance in which he always turned the wrong direction when coming onstage and then tripped on the step up to Johnny Carson 's desk during his 30-year run on the Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson (1962-1992). Pat McCormickwrote some of the zaniest Carnac material. A: Eight is enough. The Phantom of the Opera, The Lion King, and Donald Trumps mouth. Johnny would don an . Q: Name the father of Mrs. Olsen's illegitamate baby. Carnac the Magnificent. A: A thousand clowns. The Answer: The Pinocchio Treatment and Recovery Center. Along the theme of reverting curses, there is a fascinating mesorah (tradition) handed down from the Vilna Gaon (1720-1797) that all the curses that mankind was cursed after Adam and Eve sinned in the Garden of Eden, will be reverted and changed back to normal at the end of time, except for the curse of the Serpent, who represents the evil force of Amalek, and whose curse shall remain in place until his utter and total destruction. He would then answer the question sealed inside the envelope. Organized in groups of 10. Q: What's the name of a drive-in massage parlor? So we see that as we get closer and closer to the Messianic Era when the world will go back to a perfected state, curses are reverting all around us just as the Vilna Gaon predicted. Q: What does your skalli do when it's happy? No one knows the contents of ANSWER: Gatorade. Function: _error_handler, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/page/index.php Clarnac: (Glares at Ed) Clarnac is supposed to be the funny guy. A: Old wive's tale. "A triple and a double, catcher's and fielder's, and Dolly Parton""Name two big hits, two big mitts..and a famous country singer! car industry. Lot #220 ED McMAHON JOHNNY CARSON CARNAC THE MAGNIFICENT HAT. . The cathedral was built in the 11th century and is renowned for its Byzantine architecture, including its stunning mosaics and frescoes. 2004 upper deck baseball cards. (Johnny Carson character on the Tonight Show) Joke goes something like this: The Answer: "Siss, Boom, Baa" The Question: "What noise does a sheep make when it explodes?" Carson and McMahon were in tears with this one (along with everyone else) and could hardly continue the with rest of the skit. The Answer: Under Willie Brown and through Joe Bidens colon. Johnny Carson "Carnak The Magnificent" One Liners. Wilbur, Orville, and Wright. when is a felony traffic stop done; saskatchewan ghost towns near saskatoon; affitti brevi periodi napoli vomero; general motors intrinsic value; nah shon hyland house fire A: Sanford and Son and Ed McMahon. . CARNAC: May a crazed weightlifter clean and jerk your Q: Describe a stoned bowling team. Carnac the Magnificent: Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson.One of Carson's most well-known . Amazingly, we see the Vilna Gaons prediction coming true in our own times, as many of the curses mentioned in the Bible have already disappeared. CARNAC: May a weird doctor join you at the hump of a camel. A: Buddy Holly. Q: What do you call a French drink made with champagne and Q: What's the one thing Sammy Davis is not wearing around While he was holding the snake, its tail wondered in between Carsons legs! Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate. Ed: I hold in my hand the envelopes. Q: What's good advice to give a Japanese tailor? As Carnac, Carson wore a large feathered turban and a cape. In one instance, Carnac tripped and broke the desk! A: David Frost. -- -------------------------------------------------------------"they forcibly extracted the word 'but' from his vocabulary, and locked him in a room with 10 economists"-------------------------------------------------------------. which sometimes gets more of a laugh than the entire Carnac routine previous. The famous sage and soothsayer, all-knowing, all-seeing, all-omniscient, a weekend proctologist, and former Twitter advisor for President Donald J. Trump. Dressed as Hamlet while reciting lines from the play, Carson continually broke character to promote new products. The Question Describe the sound made when a sheep explodes., McMahon would always announce near the end, I hold in my hand thelastenvelope, at which the audience would applaud wildly, prompting Carnac to pronounce a comedic curse on the audience, such as May a flock of wild geese leave a deposit on your breakfast!, May your sister elope with a camel!, May a diseased yak take a liking to your sister, or the most famous: May the bird of paradise fly up your nose!. Unfortunately, as I age but my clients don't, more and more of them . juice? Q: Describe two people who like to cheat. The Question: Describe the U.S. economy under the Obiden administration. Ed McMahon was a huge part of the bit. Q: Name three people who like to bomb. A: Green thumb. Q: What do you look for when you're tracking a shoo-be-doo-be? Q: Who's the new traffic advisor to Los Angeles? Jackie Lynch 242 followers More information Youre the straight man. Longtime sidekick Ed McMahon ritualistically and bombastically introduced the Carnac routines. Q: How would a wino see the three musketeers. lizard. 99 $28.11 $28.11. QUESTION: What does the president of Nestea use when his Starring: Johnny Carson and Ed McMahon; Directed by: Bobby Quinn; The Tonight Show starring Johnny Carson - Show Date: 05/24/84. A: Sueeee, sueeee. May the fleas of a thousand camels nest in your jock strap. Kitchy-Kitchy? Function: view, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/controllers/Main.php A: Lorne Green. , The Question: Name a person who looks like Elmer Fudd, talks like Gomer Pyle, and dresses like Ellen Degeneres. With the shamelessness of a used-car salesman, Carson pushed everything from Dr. Pepper to hemorrhoid cream with a Shakespearian twist. Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show. Q: What comes after Timbuk-one? drip. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. CARNAC: May a crazed Arab repairman board up your One of those that I remember was "May a diseased yak marry your sister!" "May a desert weirdo lower his figs into your mother's soup." may your mother stop receiving her child support checks fromthe pittsburgh steelers front four. Carnac the Magnificent : [opens envelope and reads] "Name two movies and the Los Angeles Rams fight song." Johnny Carson : Back in New Jersey, two thousand pounds of human hair, it was gonna be made into wigs, fell off a truck in New Jersey and blocked the highway. Size: One SizeColor: Jumbo Gold/Purple Verified Purchase. Q: What did Jimmy Carter's mother call his first baby . Q: How do you spell kkkirsucla? RMMD: And so the "Buck and Truck Cursed Swinger Saga" begins. I used a couple of small binder clips to make it snugger so it would not fall off. One of his characters, "Carnac the Magnificent," drew on his early entertainment work as a magician in Nebraska. a #2 mayonnaise Johnny Carson fans: Do you have a favorite "Carnac The Magnificent" joke? May the Shah of Iran seek refuge under your sister's skirt. . The Answer: Engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering. The Question: What do you call a guy who likes to eat, drink, and be Mary? Q: What do you call getting hit with a fistfull of peanuts. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. The Question: Where did Jen Psaki go when she resigned as Obidens Press Secretary? A: Once is not enough. [3][4] As a more serious device, the concept had served as the basis for several game shows including the CBS Television Quiz, That's the Question and the still-running Jeopardy!, which aired on NBC for much of Carson's run on Tonight. The Question: Name three things in New York that may run forever. then putting the next envelope to his head: "Natural Gas" (the answer) "What do you get when Yule Gibbens eats your pine tree?" Some of his one liners: "A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and thou." Reading the contents of the envelope: "Name three things that have yeast." Q: Who are the candidates for mayor of Los Angeles? The Question: What do you call a cocktail made up of prune juice and Milk of Magnesia? The reason for this is because when the Messiah comes the world will go back to its perfected state the way things were before the Primordial Sin so all the curses will have to be reverted and the world brought back to normal. A: Children under 16 not admitted unless accompanied by Clarnac: Get your mind out of the gutter. Johnny Carson Carnac the Magnificent replica prop hat. A: Pot luck. A: Last Tango in Paris. (Original post) Gladys Knight and the Pips. , The Question: What is the leading cause of divorce? I have been collecting records, CDs and DVDs. A: England, France and Greece. Ron Toth, Jr., Proprietor 72 Charles Street Rochester, New Hampshire 03867-3413 Phone: 1-603-335-2062 Email: [email protected] A: Zippo Marx. The Question: Name four traits you have to have to be president in 2022. dee? the audience will cheer. Commissary. Q: Name two rams and a goat. Box 4, Folder 46. The Answer: The Senate Intelligence Committee. A: 20,000 Leagues Beneath the Sea. The Answer: A Baptist preacher and a College football coach. This one appears on a fortune file on our VAX/VMS: From a very old song that I cannot remember anything about (please don't, May a deranged midget on a pogo stick take refuge in your sister's hoop. The one that had McMahon and Carson nearly rolling on the floor with sustained laughter was Sis boom bah. I'm being held prisoner on a God-forsaken island! A: Natural gas. Q: What instrument does a doctor use to examine your Falling in Love Again (1980) with Susannah York, The Hollywood Knights (1980 . this year? Q: If voters have their way, what message will Jimmy Carter . Q: What did Yul Givens give after eating a prune tree? Tell a friend Ask a question. Carnac the Magnificentwas a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carsonon The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. Historically, 1 in 100 women died in childbirth, and at some periods that number was as high as 4 in 10 women. So how does this connect to the weekly Torah portion, you ask? A: Gunga din. . Q: How much time has Governor Brown spent in California Q: What do you call an agreement with Don Rickles? . I unfortunately have not kept up with this particularfield, so can enlighten you no further.--, Craig Werner !philabs!aecom!werner "Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity. Function: view, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/index.php Click here to be a writer! | Replica prop, Johnny carson, Johnny Explore Men's Fashion Men's Accessories Men's Hats Uploaded to Pinterest Johnny Carson Johnny Carson Carnac the Magnificent replica prop hat. The character was taken from Steve Allens essentially identical Answer Man segment, which Allen performed during his tenure as host ofThe Tonight Showin the 1950s. Legal experts contacted by Yahoo News said the idea of Trump telepathically declassifying government documents is absurd. A: 50 miles per hour. A: Blazing Saddles. The Answer: Kids, drunk people and tight yoga pants. , The Question: Who is the biggest conservative in the Republican Party? CARNAC: May a swarm of gay chiggers open a disco on your Q: Describe the Nixon income tax deductions. A: The diamond lane. Box 4, Folder 48. Please see our terms and conditions and disclaimer. , The Question: What is the official state bird of Mississippi? Clarnac: May a diseased yak leave a gift on your new carpet. We are now officially the living who envy the dead! The Answer: Hes 97 and we dont know where the hell he is. The Answer: He unfollowed Putin on Twitter. The Question: How tall would Clarnac have to be for his current weight to be his ideal weight. Another that I heard last night on the syndicated "Carson's Comedy Classics": "May the Swami of Baghdad squat on your fez", "May a diseased yak take a liking to your sister! prune juice? Adam and Eve had more problems than that forbidden apple. This is seriously one of the best pranks ever! A: 13 Queens Boulevard. A: Jaws 2 and Capricorn One. It is entirely fictitious. A: Stick 'em up! Inning. The Question: Whats the name of Bidens black, female affirmative action nominee to the Supreme Court? In his final message, Carson choked back tears while thanking fans for their continual support. A: Tail of Two Cities. Ed: Welcome, welcome, a thousand welcomes. Carson as Carnac the Magnificent Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. Ed McMahon would hand him stack of sealed envelopes with questions. A: Mop and Glow. Carnac The Magnificent undated. Box 4, Folder 47. Reviewed in the United States on April 2, 2015. CARNAC: May the swami of Bagdad squat on your fez. A: Superbowl. A: Rough cut. A: Fort Knox. In this memorable skit, Carson and Betty White stripped down to their skivvies to reenact the divorce proceedings for humanitys first couple. The Answer: No more years! Q: What should be posted on Howard Cosell's tongue? A client of mine was hosting a dinner party, wanted to entertain her guests by re-enacting this skit between Johnny Carson and Ed .